My Christmas Part 2

This is the most beautifully decorated Christmas tree I've ever laid eyes on...no joke, I've never seen a tree like this: https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibwzA6KGqyyULY-n08hNf-M8eNQdg-8IQpFq8jx3BYOdFWskrElFDE4aiDaFmEEr_W29XzsIbNYZpz1b5SuDC1w9-OHfPjy84GUXcJkcvH1FhcJZpIqsGd_ZwTx9R_eWf10n_h9eB35PhF/s1600-h/IMG_1955.JPG

The more Christmas is heading here fast....the more I am not caring about it much...besides the giving part, I always care about giving.....why do we make it all about the material things anyways? I am happy just remembering why we have the holiday....until I see all of the decorated houses on the outside with their light up reigndeers and light up santa's, and the beautifully decorated Christmas Trees that you can see peering through the windows from the outside of a frosty window....the more I see that stuff the more bitter I get about the holiday from wishing so much that I wasn't sitting in this tiny undecorated house...not a tree, nothing...not even a single window cling....last year I attempted to even put up some window clings and I totally got yelled at! Though I am a little bitter...at least it's teaching me that when I get a little older my house is going to be completely decked out on holidays! Someday I will have my own little family, my own little decorated home, and I won't be alone as often as I am now....I just know it. That has to be one of my biggest dreams in life...I can't wait :0) ...but for now I guess I'm going to try to embrace the holiday, be thankful that I actually have a place to live (decorated or not), and be thankful that I have the bit of family I have left even though I don't see them much, and don't know the rest of them. God has placed me here for a reason, with this family, this home, these experiences, and these belongings......and so far it has taught me ALOT and given me alot more wisdom than I should have at my age, and alot more wisdom than I show I have-->(I'm not AS innocent as I seem, been through things u might not be able to imagine)...but I just am ready for something different because this...is getting old.
-Beautifully Broken Beautiful Disaster