Uncontainable Love

Is it possible to love someone so much??? It’s indescribable, undeniable, uncontainable love! I can’t help but love him more and more every time I see his sweet little face! We spend our time reading stories, playing shooters, learning colors and shapes, counting, cuddling on the couch, ect.. but his favorite thing we do is chase each other around the house. Whether its on a good day or a bad day this little one can ALWAYS put a smile on my face and joy in my heart! If I had to take care of him every day, I wouldn’t even mind one bit! I love playing mommy when Amanda and Justin are busy! I can’t help but wonder what he will be like in 10 or 15 years, and I can’t help but pray that since he has such amazing parents, that he grows up to be a real gentleman just like his daddy and still carries his daddy’s crazy-happy-risky spunk and his mommy’s sweet heart, caring eyes and contagious smile! The more time I spend with him, the more beautiful he becomes to me and the more it leaves me hoping for a little boy of my own in 5 years that I can stay at home wit, take care of, teach and learn from…that is something that makes me feel A LOT closer to God. The thought that he could create something so small that can change your mind, your heart…and your entire life just makes you wonder how much more can He give us to be thankful for? How could we NOT want to live our lives for Him? So my thought of the day is…maybe the way I feel about Javen is the way that God feels about us and the way we are suppose to feel about him too…an indescribable, undeniable, uncontainable love. Any lasting words or thoughts??

-A Future Mommy

Passion

(insert wise words about passion)...u might be wondering why this has been left blank..well that's pretty much what my passion looks like lately..blank. Let's hope it returns soon because I am becoming uninterested in everything from social interaction to..dare I say it...God...now don't beat me with a metal pole or anything...hopefully it will soon return..and then I can sleep, eat, and live like a human instead of a zombie! I'm so lame...not to mension a new face would help.
-Beautifully Broken

Through The Long Night

I listened to a song earlier and it said "Jesus you found me through the long night you led me and set me free." When I hear that I imagine literally being held, I picture myself crying about what I've been feeling lately and being held and how my daddy used to and the way he would stroke my hair and tell me that everything would be ok and that he would be there and that making me feel better. That can never happen again, I can never have another moment like that with him and that's what I need but can't have. His love, his arms, his voice, and him comforting me. But when I hear that song it reminds me of that. I miss him so much more everyday. I miss having a family and parents...especially when I really need it. But oh well life is like the energizer bunny..it keeps going and going and going!
-Beautiful Disaster

Fairytale

So if I got to write my own fairytale here's how it would go...

Once upon a time there was an ice princess..she wasn't like the other princesses who were surrounded by tons of real cute animals, or ate bad apples. or lost a slipper...she just simply wanted somebody to love. someone to love her and longed to have somewhere and someone to belong to! She had a pure heart and often failed to see her own beauty although others saw it..they rarely reassured her of what they saw in her. As the Ice Princess sat..she often longed for her Prince to come save her. She wasn't guarded by any fir breathing dragons. or any curses..but rather guarded by her own heart. One day a sweet boy came along and she saw that he wasn't like every other guy who looked at her from the outside only to find themselves lusting over looks. He saw her every flaw...and only found beauty in each flaw. He saw her true heart...and helped her break the wall she built. He swept her off her feet completely and melted her heart. He helped her fall even more in love with the one true God..and that's why she was so attracted to him. They got happily married..and had very beautiful children!...if you wrote a fairytale about your life or something that's on your heart what would your story be?? I'm interested to see other stories! Comments? Love? Anything?? Go write your story!!
-Beautifully Broken

Beaches

So yesterday I was looking through old things and watched a video I made last summer for a friend...and after it was over I realized that last summer for me was a summer of new friendship. Then I got to thinking about the possibilities of this summer and so far...I don't know the possibilities..possibilites for any kind of life this summer is looking pretty slim...I'd like it to include a plane ride to somewhere warm....and a beach! I'd LOVE to go to the beach..SO...MUCH!! I've never been to the beach...but I'd love to spend a day at the beach and watch the sun set with one or more true friends or even take a girls trip to a beach somewhere! I want to go to the beach so badly that it has created ALOT of jealousy towards all of the people going to Florida for a wedding this week...*sigh* someday I will get to set eyes on a beach...and it will be a dream come true for me! Life goal list item: Visit a beach and watch the sun set..or rise!

-Wishfully Waiting

God and Sea Hearts

That...is something called a sea heart. They are found on exotic islands. The sea forms these stones and they wash up on shore. I think this is so cool and interesting because God is love...and we symbolize love most of the time with hearts. It reminds me that...God created this entire earth with his own hands...every little speck, every little atom. every little stone...he made specially with every bit of love he has...which is everything he is. what he stands for. Love.

-Beautiful Disaster

Love

Love. Simple word to say...hard to explain and hard to do the right way. Did you know St.Valentine (the guy who this day is named after) was killed because of his love for God? Today is Valentine's Day...and unlike most single people I wasn't depressed but angry...I woke up in an okay mood...but got to work and my co-workers made sure to make it easy for my mood to be ruined..but I love them anyways. Some of them probably don't deserve for me to show them love still but I just grin and bear it..I never show or say that I'm mad at them but in my mind I'm screaming!!...it takes so much to love people right where they're at. Love is hard...but easy...complex and simple...heartwarming...but sometimes heart-breaking. But true love...is Jesus...God is love! (agape' love). One day I won't be by myself on Valentine's Day...I will be with a smokin' hottie on a date and dot dot dot (thats from Mama Mia and you'll have to watch it to know what it means) and he will be so in love with God that THAT is what attracts me the most! Happy Valentine's Day!

Naive

Naive. To be naive means lacking experience in something, innocent, and most people use it to describe young people normally teens...but because of society today very few teens are naive and u can't keep too many things from ur kids cuz they find out anyways. A lot of people label me as "naive"...they think I don't know alot..and it bothers me. I know a lot more than they think...I don't lack any experience whatsoever in life! I just choose to not talk about what I know and my experience in certain areas...but me...I may seem naive and innocent but the truth is I'm not either of those. I actually probably missed half of my childhood..but I am strong because of it...and life goes on...I'm so lucky to even be alive since I nearly died as a baby and then completely died at age 8..but I guess my point is labels SUCK..especially when they are completely wrong!
-Beautiful Disaster

Testing Faith

Okay the past few days have been anything but good...car issues, which need to be solved soon but aren't guarunteed to be...and the new developements in these issues today...phone issues (good luck getting ahold of me unless I'm on facebook at Panera or at church), and losing my voice (my job happens to offer the best health insurance..psht!)....perfect. Either my faith is majorly being tested, or my patience is just wearing thin and missing...well speaking of missing something..I'm STILL missing my bible...hmm maybe that could be the issue?...ha yeah right, I'm kidding myself...but I NEED it at this point...yes NEED!! I honestly don't know how I'm gonna solve any of these issues....they all have to do with that stupid paper green stuff...which I have none of....but whatever...God chose..the perfect timing for all of this..so maybe he will choose the perfect timing to bring me a freaking solution!...Porkies...just ain't cutting it....AT ALL! Oh the joys of being an adult...God is growing me....I'd rather grow back down now. Pretty much at the point where I'm BEGGING Jesus to come back NOW..even though I'm honestly not sure whether I'd go to heaven or hell...
-No longer beautiful...but a Disaster for sure

Searching

This morning I was listening to a song called Catch Me When I Fall by Ashlee Simpson and its SO SAD...the life of Hollywood celebrities is SO sad! In the song she is searching for something someone to help her, be there for her and talking about how she feels like there's no one for her to go to...that no one truly cares even though there's always people around her, all they care about is her career. That she's completely lonely and she says "Who will be the one to save me from myself, who will be the one who's there, I'm not ashamed to see me crawl, who's gonna catch me when I fall.."...she said it might seem like she has everything but everything means nothing because the life she lives leaves her feeling lost. We all dream about being celebrities, or have at one point...and I myself would be lieing if I said I didn't concidering performing is a way of life for me. But I realize how truely lucky I am to have a God who is there all the time, and that I know HE has placed certain people in my life for a reason. Nicole and I were chatting last night and we both have the same feelings about different people. I am SO lucky to have people who care about me and SO thankful to have Amanda, Justin and Javen in my life....it NEVER fails to make me give glory and praise to God because that song used to be like the story of my life....before God. Today...everyday whether its a good day or a bad day....I PRAISE our faithful God and thank him for everyone he has put in my life, and how lucky I am to not have to feel that way anymore even though sometimes I still do.
-Beautiful Disaster