Caterpillar...Life

Well where do I start? God is AMAZING!.. that was a perfect place to start! It's been a little rough and a little good lately.. I've seen plenty of both sides.. and have no clue why writing that made me tear up but I guess those are my true feelings, which I don't really express very often. I am finally leaving Porkies.. Porkies has taught me patience, kindness always, and good manners. I am leaving Porkies.. for McDonald's..I know it doesn't SEEM like a big step.. but it really is.. and most importantly I get insurance.. and for me and my sickly self.. that's AWESOME! I feel like I've got a ton of potential to move up and tons of chances to become bigger things there. Most of my time is spent working, serving at church, attending church, and my favorites.. hanging out and bonding with Amanda, Nicole, and Mady mostly AND taking care of Javen! That little boy sure knows how to leave very deep footprints in a heart!.. as well as the rest of them. I wouldn't trade my life for anything.. even though sometimes I swear it's going to fall and break into a million tiny pieces.. but because of these people and their constant love I know that I am blessed.

The thing on my heart the most lately has been my parents. I often long for my Daddy, I miss him alot. Oh how I WISH that I could see his face and feel his comfort and warmth.. he would be so proud of me and my accomplishments even though I decided to not go to school this year. I miss my Momma alot too... and though she is still here it still feels as if she is not present. As I was listening to the song Butterfly Fly Away.. it reminded me so much of my Momma. My Daddy wasn't always present... and I lived with my Mom for the most part, so I understand how tiring and hard it was to take care of me on her own, but even so we used to have so much fun together. Sure I never got tucked in at night and we never really had our bonding moments but I remember that she used to always at least say I love you before I went to bed. I just miss her so much though. Finally being out of the house has been great.. although we have drifted and I see her about once or twice a month. Anyways.. I could talk for days about that... it makes me very sad. I guess there comes a time when the caterpillar has to break out of it's cacoon, become a butterfly and fly away.. and maybe that's exactly what this situation is teaching me.

- Caterpillar In The Tree